tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.comments2012-10-16T10:30:26.583-07:00At the CrossroadsAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11600758663325614862noreply@blogger.comBlogger58125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-17007842675296895022012-10-06T07:47:57.442-07:002012-10-06T07:47:57.442-07:00I wholeheartedly agree! Thanks for sharing your th...I wholeheartedly agree! Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I love to hear a man's perspective on these things. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11600758663325614862noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-88478644466484913352012-10-05T10:37:49.952-07:002012-10-05T10:37:49.952-07:00Jenny,
Wow. I'm blown away. Thank you for e...Jenny,<br /> Wow. I'm blown away. Thank you for expressing what has been festering in the back of my mind for close to 20 years now. This 25 year old narrative that pits the smart, capable woman against the strong, stupid man, has grown tiresome. It is a failed philosophy that blames every societal ill on dumb, aggressive men and holds the promise of a blessed, matriarchal utopia. Oh please. Without men, women are nothing. Without women, men are nothing.<br /><br /> I'm old enough to remember the old, "stupid woman", biases and was so glad to see them go away. I never bought into them anyway because I was blessed with a very smart mother and a Dad who recognized how great that is. They make a great team. When I met my wife, I recognized another smart, strong woman and we made a life together. It's been great.<br /><br /> These old-school biases led to a backlash that had to happen. But we have tipped the scale to the other extreme. Boys are ignored in school. They graduate at lower rates than girls and men are more likely them women to lose their jobs when the economy gets rocky. Boys have become liabilities and men relegated to the status of sperm donors. This is pathological.<br /><br /> Let's recognize the unique skills that we all have, regardless of gender. If we encourage girls AND boys to be smart and strong and nurturing, we can weather any storm.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-50435434395585571032012-10-05T10:06:41.566-07:002012-10-05T10:06:41.566-07:00I tend to agree with you in many ways, and I think...I tend to agree with you in many ways, and I think there are several angles to take here. I never want to suggest children are "damaged" if they don't have early religious education - but I will continue to bristle at anyone who tells me I'm damaging my children giving them one. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11600758663325614862noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-22785525769788013622012-10-05T10:01:09.769-07:002012-10-05T10:01:09.769-07:00Amen, Mama. Kudos to you, too :-)Amen, Mama. Kudos to you, too :-)Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11600758663325614862noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-88412680510869542912012-10-05T09:20:23.894-07:002012-10-05T09:20:23.894-07:00Hear, Hear!! Somewhere in the "women must be ...Hear, Hear!! Somewhere in the "women must be strong" teachings, the boys get lost. They get assigned to be the rough and tough and maybe sometimes fumblingly romantic "because how else will he find a good woman" and it makes me SO mad! My son is a critical thinker, a sweet and sensitive guy, equally happy with Superman AND Cinderella costumes and sometimes HIS singing makes *my* heart sing so loudly that it drowns out the rest of the world. I like it that way. I love ALL of my children for their unique and endearing personalities, not because they are boys or girls. Gender is the WORST discrimination we can foust upon our children. It can break a spirit like nothing else. Kudos to the families I hang with for fighting those biases tooth and nail <3Mama living wellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13954846341286029446noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-61691573820892824492012-09-27T06:27:39.161-07:002012-09-27T06:27:39.161-07:00Don't despair! My husband has a very sweet re...Don't despair! My husband has a very sweet relationship with his mother - in fact, she lives with us! Even when we were dating he made a point of having a one-on-one dinner date with his mom every month. The trick, I think, is staying connected to your child and accepting who he is in each moment. If he feels you "get" him he will remain connected to you. Christina Wolf, Lic Achttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16907826896445199743noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-23727229625729777892012-09-19T18:13:15.563-07:002012-09-19T18:13:15.563-07:00I was raised with no religion. The only times I a...I was raised with no religion. The only times I attended church, as a child, was for weddings and funerals. My knowledge about God and religion was based on what I learned in school which amounted to almost nothing. School taught me about evolution, and the big bang. So that's what I believed in. Strangely enough I didn't even begin to doubt my beliefs until I became a parent. <br />For the past ten years I have been searching for a belief that feels right to me. I'm not sure as if I'll ever find one. However, I'm not so certain that it cripples me either. I never made choices in my life because it's what Jesus would have done, or because I was fearful of judgment day. I have made choices in my life based on what felt right, morally. I listen to my conscience and treat others with respect. I try to always think about the feelings of others and teach my children to do the same. I try every day to be a good person, for me, and for my family. I learned all of these things without religion and was in no way "damaged" by it. <br />In the end, when you put two good people next to each other...does it really matter which one was raised with their religion and which one had to search for it? Bethnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-70213795958142410832012-09-17T19:19:41.776-07:002012-09-17T19:19:41.776-07:00You are not only my beautiful daughter. You are a ...You are not only my beautiful daughter. You are a kindred spirit. I "get" you! <br />Janet Everetthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14564796836983993361noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-990378812193549292012-09-02T18:24:17.614-07:002012-09-02T18:24:17.614-07:00I've been sitting here trying to put into word...I've been sitting here trying to put into words what I feel right now. I am just so incredibly amazed at your wisdom, and by the keen sense you have of the fragility of the time you are granted with your children when they are young--and how well you know your precious Delaney! Looking back from the "other side" now, I thank God that I was able to have you as much as I did, and I wish I could erase from your psyche those times when you felt somehow "less than" during your days in public school. I so wish you had never had to experience that. And although homeschooling six kids was a grueling task at times, now that I'm finally finished, I AM glad that I did it. So many times I wanted to give up, and I know I didn't always make the best choices. And I didn't have the internet or great homeschool groups like you do. But I did have your father and he was my greatest cheerleader. He knew you were better off at home with your frazzled, overwhelmed, disorganized, neurotic mother...who somehow with God's grace was able to teach you to love learning...and when I look at the beautiful, creative, gifted person that you are I feel humbled. I love you. XXXJanet Everetthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14564796836983993361noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-41202051841552051852012-09-02T06:14:56.859-07:002012-09-02T06:14:56.859-07:00You really are such an amazing Mommy. Laney is a g...You really are such an amazing Mommy. Laney is a great kid because you and Jake are the ones that have been raising her. She cracks me up and I can't wait to get to know her more!Mamaof2https://www.blogger.com/profile/08754951687366066444noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-61399498843884270332012-08-29T08:34:28.317-07:002012-08-29T08:34:28.317-07:00I am pro-life, and pro-choice. In my opinion, the ...I am pro-life, and pro-choice. In my opinion, the two are not mutually exclusive. I am pro-life in that I believe life begins at conception, and that the final product is a living, breathing, human being. I am pro-choice in that I do not believe that the government should have the right to legislate what medical procedures I choose to have done to my body. Morally and ethically I do not believe in abortion. On the same hand, morally and ethically, I believe that it is each woman's individual decision whether to continue or terminate a pregnancy. We need to educate people, not legislate, on this issue!!!Janet Seatznoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-20474921075019842122012-08-28T15:37:34.082-07:002012-08-28T15:37:34.082-07:00I'm also pro-life.
Forcible rape? What other...I'm also pro-life.<br /><br />Forcible rape? What other kind of rape is there?<br /><br />I look forward to reading more from your blog.Zhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11922280985584487584noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-25089012311949481652012-08-28T08:46:03.941-07:002012-08-28T08:46:03.941-07:00Very much pro-life over here too! The ability to c...Very much pro-life over here too! The ability to carry and birth a child is absolutely amazing. It is an honor.Mamaof2https://www.blogger.com/profile/08754951687366066444noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-7277089969895269062012-08-27T19:33:17.148-07:002012-08-27T19:33:17.148-07:00This comment has been removed by the author.Rosemaryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12470988402469275239noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-33785178093192287552012-08-27T11:23:58.730-07:002012-08-27T11:23:58.730-07:00I love your ability to see meaning in the everyday...I love your ability to see meaning in the everydayness of family life!!!!! You are incredibly gifted with words...and you see things through the lens of wisdom (which you technically should be too young to have acquired!) We always said you were "advanced"...<br />Janet Everetthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14564796836983993361noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-15471841185285395152012-08-24T19:35:45.742-07:002012-08-24T19:35:45.742-07:00Cute and comforting blog post Jenny. Thanks. I'...Cute and comforting blog post Jenny. Thanks. I'm realizing more and more that there's nothing to worry about. Give 'em wings, give 'em roots, give 'em cotton candy for breakfast ... whatever. They more than anything need to know you love and support them, that there are boundaries (and that's not really limiting, it's liberating), that rich or poor there is always somewhere for them to come back to. The parents who ask, "Am I doing right by my kids?" are the best parents.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-69147772337380852692012-08-15T08:54:31.293-07:002012-08-15T08:54:31.293-07:00More and more lately, I'm thinking if your kid...More and more lately, I'm thinking if your kid winds up in therapy it means you did something *right* - that they can recognize when something is "off" and take steps to correct it. So I fully intend to pat myself on the back even if (when) my kids are in therapy ;-)Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11600758663325614862noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-85059725775173502252012-08-15T08:53:39.691-07:002012-08-15T08:53:39.691-07:00This comment has been removed by the author.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11600758663325614862noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-52770661086608350122012-08-15T07:52:33.716-07:002012-08-15T07:52:33.716-07:00If it makes you feel any better, Jenny, I always b...If it makes you feel any better, Jenny, I always believed that we wouldn't know if we were doing it right until the kids all reached adulthood. If they didn't end up as convicted felons we could figure that we didn't do everything wrong. If they ended up as God-fearing, law-abiding, productive members of society, we could give ourselves a pat on the back. And if they ended up in therapy we would not take it personally!sharon kinghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13524727339999954194noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-68122047098384764972012-08-10T06:45:50.948-07:002012-08-10T06:45:50.948-07:00Thanks, everybody, for sharing your experiences! P...Thanks, everybody, for sharing your experiences! Postpartum mood disorders can take so many different forms, and unfortunately most of us have only stories like Andrea Yates that we associate with it. I decided to share my experience because it was only with my THIRD child (and involvement with PPD on a professional level rather than a personal one) that I fully accepted I was suffering and needed to do something about it - despite knowing for years that both my family history and personal history put me at an elevated risk anyway. <br />The blog Postpartum Progress by Katherine Stone (http://www.postpartumprogress.com/)is an excellent, comprehensive source of information on the different forms PPD, etc. can take, and offers a lot of support. Postpartum Support International (http://www.postpartum.net/)is another great resource. I don't think I can put hyperlinks in the comments, but you can cut and paste either of those into your browser for detailed information. <br />Meeting with a counselor or therapist is invaluable, and I'm so glad I decided to do it. There are also a lot of community support groups, including a great group that meets locally. And I am always here to talk as a friend if anyone wants.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11600758663325614862noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-21987961993633795762012-08-10T04:50:59.585-07:002012-08-10T04:50:59.585-07:00Oh Jenny...I wish you were around when I was a new...Oh Jenny...I wish you were around when I was a new mommy with Lexie. I experienced the exact same thing, and still do from time to time. And I never thought it was PPD. Isn't that when mother's fear they will hurt their own baby? I never thought that. I was just able to picture all the ways that she may possible get hurt, vividly. Nightmares. And about Ben too. Like him getting in a car accident on his way home from work. I was terrified every morning when he left, that he wouldn't come home. It was awful. I felt so alone. And so hard to talk about with others. I still have some horrible nightmares (my most common is seeing Lexie catch on fire). Unreal, right? But horrible. And it pops into my head sometimes and completely takes over me like pure torture. We should definitely talk.Abbeyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10165634995000034185noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-32402116395143670382012-08-09T04:39:57.815-07:002012-08-09T04:39:57.815-07:00Oh, very nice, Jen. A clear picture of an active,...Oh, very nice, Jen. A clear picture of an active, creative, God-loving household.kaybeehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14473317230010542909noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-57687708267758245352012-08-07T04:59:04.574-07:002012-08-07T04:59:04.574-07:00Jen, this is very nice. You never do stop worryin...Jen, this is very nice. You never do stop worrying about your kids. FYI, I dropped Catie in a trash can when she was two weeks old. I had never been around babies and forgot to support her head. Fortunately, the trash can was filled with newspapers and she had a soft landing.Kathy Baileyhttp://blogofages-kaybee.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-67823449007252785482012-08-06T15:36:57.379-07:002012-08-06T15:36:57.379-07:00This hits home, big time. Thought this was totally...This hits home, big time. Thought this was totally normal. Thanks!Christanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7089791052770963638.post-42301078452777973162012-08-06T15:34:52.660-07:002012-08-06T15:34:52.660-07:00You're certainly not alone in that. Granted fo...You're certainly not alone in that. Granted for me it wasn't PPD, just basic ol' D. I had a very rough patch after a friend of mine passed away and "scary thoughts" ruled my life. It's something that's not really talked about as a symptom of anything, but it's important to address that as you said, "fixing them" are to keep you sane, not to prevent you from acting anything out. It can be really scary to handle, but you can get through them!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com